I don't miss him. I miss a partner. I miss the extra pair of hands in the house. I miss having another adult to hang out with. But I don't miss him. It could be a function of how I am protecting myself. It could be that he checked out in April/May so he's been gone so long already. It could be survival. It could be because of how completely he shattered this family. Or almost did. Almost. So very close.
I have learned that you can't choose who you fall in love with. I have also learned that you can absolutely choose who not to love any more. Obviously made easier when the other does it first. Or harder. It depends on the moment I am in.
August 16th was the final discovery day. After many months and many extra chances. And still I loved. More discoveries. Still I loved. Then it was time for him to go. He's been out since December and it's barely mid-February and I don't miss him. And as relieved as I am, it is also really, really sad.
Thanks for coming along on this journey with me. Think that what I am saying is worth sharing? Please do. It'll help a girl out!