You lot, it is my birthday month. I have never understood the joy over celebrating the entire month. Seemed like a ton of extra work but I am feeling like this year I can get into it. The past few birthdays have ushered in doozy's of a year. I turned 40 with the perfect, intimate party and really thought I had cancer a week later. I was wrong in the best of ways. I was pregnant with Parley. I turned 41 in the midst of the whirling storms of my marriage failing. Of course, I didn't know how far gone it was until the end of July and middle of August. But, listen, I am talking about the birthday as the welcoming of a the new year, not any specific trauma on the day itself.
So here I am about to turn 42. Newly single. Parenting alone for far more than a year and being in our yellow house alone for over six months. So, you know what? Bring on 42! I survived the highs and lows of 40. New pregnancy, premature baby, NICU, infidelity, marriage counseling, health issues, kid issues and general life. I kicked 41's ass. Even if it is in only that I didn't let it kick mine. I slogged through the girlfriend ish, thousands of instagram messages I wish I could forget, solo trips to NYC and Maine and Newport, playdates and homework and I got the eff out of bed. Every day. Honestly? I am not sure I would consider any year in my life more successful in just showing up than 41. But that was then. This is now.
42 is young. So, so young. I have my more than half my life ahead of me. And I get to make my own choices. Narrate my own story. My eyes are wide open and I am giddy that this is the year I get to rebuild and search out all that my KBs and I deserve. There is something immensely powerful in that. The knowing that I got this. I survived the fire. I rise from the ashes. Like a favorite author, Glennon Doyle, says, first the pain, then the rising. I am ready to rise. Bring on the cake!
Really, bring it on. Somebody please get me this cake.
Happy Birthday to me. Give this a share. As a gift to meeeeeee.
Or use this link to do a little amazon damage. A gift to meeeeeee!
OR this link to buy yourself something sparkly, like this wishing necklace. Also a gift to meeeeeee!